Showing posts with label WRITING. Show all posts
Showing posts with label WRITING. Show all posts

Thursday, April 27, 2017

14/30 Stray

I used to have a home. If you could call it that. There was a lot of noise all the time. When they do not think you understand what is happening you pretend you do not know what is happening. When the one with long fingers left, the food bowl would be empty more than not. Water was plentiful when the toilet seat was left up which was often when the one with the long fingers left. I was always grateful for the door flap. They called it a doggie door but I am no dog, I am a cat. The first day the one with the thick fingers forgot to put food in my bowl, I was OK. There are always things left lying around, not enough to fill an empty belly but to sustain. The box they liked me to use became so pungent it hurt to breathe in the air around it. The second day would be harder.


By day three, I used the doggie door, even though I am a cat. It was early in the morning and the grass was wet. I never liked walking in wet grass but I was hungry and my instincts drew me to the woods behind the house. I heard so many things, all of them sounding like something to eat. I crouched to listen closer. When the mouse ran by I pounced. I had never pounced before. I learned that day what my claws were for, why my teeth were shaped the way they are shaped. I wondered while I ate what I had been eating? No part of this meal was crunch or cold, but warm and blood and filling. I ate it all in one feeding. Licking my paws clean after, was a celebration.I feel asleep in a dapple of light with the knowledge that I could feed myself better than the one with long fingers..


By day five I ventured so far away from the doggie door and encountered so many delicious things I had no desire to go back. I couldn't go back to the crunchy cold meals, when I had the feeling of slicing open prey coursing through me. I dined on rats, birds, chipmunks and other things that might not sound as appetizing. I fell asleep every night in a new place belly full and satisfied.


I didn't meet my first dog until week two, that day I learned to climb a tree. It's quite a thrill to learn and master something the first time you try it. He barked for almost an hour. I thought, I could sit in this tree all day, but I watched him. I like to watch dogs their bodies give up so much information. Not like us cats, you never know what we are thinking but mind you we are thinking. All the time.


I find dogs fascinating, their aggression is very much over the top, it's almost like they fear me so they become louder in an effort to convince me that I am the one afraid. I fell for it once, ok maybe twice, but after surviving 3 years in this neighborhood the dogs don't bother me anymore. They know I will wait them out, I have never met a dog prepared to strike first. For split muzzle and hell no.


It is a lonely life sometimes. I do not have people to stroke my fur or listening to my purr, like the one with the long fingers.  I take comfort in knowing that even though she left me, I have survived.


I had a partner once, she did not understand about the dogs, when they barked, in fear she struck out, they smelled it, her fear, and fell on her. I watched from the tree, until they calmed down. I buried what was left.


Every once in awhile some pretty house kitty decides to walk on the wild side, she in heat and me paying attention. It is a loud affair and brief, but, it wouldn't surprise me to know that there are other cats out there who look like me.


Surviving is what I have done best. I have learned how to avoid the cars. I look both ways before crossing, always. I avoid or stare down the dogs and sometimes the men with nets and leashes. I feed myself.Go where I want. I love the feeling of dappled sunlight and all this freedom. But every once in awhile I dream of the one with the long finger. If I ever saw her again, I wonder would she know it was me? Would I remember her?

Wednesday, April 05, 2017

5/30 Logophobia



Logophobia

there have always been words
that say what need to be said
exposing to the light
that which loves the dark spaces
in our bodies
in our world
we collect these words
one behind the other
string them along
make them make sense
fill our mouths to the brim
with the texture of them
a collection of thought
figured out
and then
something changes
not the climate of course
we have been told this does not exist
along with all the other thing
we are told does not exist
by way of attaching prefixes
post-
anti-
pre-
a way of resurrecting fears
that never died in the first place
always there lingering in plain sight
we become other words
combinations that did not exist before
a new list of collective nouns
new words to describe
the systematic grooming of a group
to be referred to as one entity
be us person,
place  
thing
state of mind of being
in this new collective
we become a litany of nothing scientific
though fully recognizable
I mean,
just the other day
in what I thought
was a civilized conversation
my unwillingness to agree with false facts
turned me in their eyes
into a battlefield of belligerence
a cacophony of chaos
such a criticism of compromise
a concern of community
the more I refused to bend my tongue
to their will
I watched them become
a clutch of pearls
a bullet of bullies
a boast of orange
shrouded in an agony of shortsightedness
they issued a warrant of warnings
wrapped in an abortion of anger
who would fear a murder of crows
when surrounded by
a disassembly of democracy
a hazard of humanity
a choke of holds

Sunday, April 02, 2017

National Poetry Month (1/30)

I am attempting 30/30 this month, thirty poems in thirty days, that I will be sharing here and on my 30/30 Blog. The last three years have been hard to unpack, so I am starting to reconcile my disappointment, and emotional duress and the words are forming. Most if not all of these attempts will be rough.

Here's the first one

Vaticination


noun vuh-tiss-uh-NAY-shun


1 : something foretold : prediction
2 : the act of prophesying


the worst
the best kind of lies
are told in the dark
sliding from whiskey soaked lips
slurring platitudes
like they have enough weight
to keep you
grounded
as you float above yourself
a sensation you will not remember
when dawn breaks
when the sun ignites
fumes of spent desire
as the forgetting begins
love recedes
falls back to lust
reclaiming the lonely it always was
even as it pretended
to be what it never
would

the bells ringing
missed intentions  
go unheard
a crashing
a siren singing songs
full of repressed shadows
hand over my mouth
no sound escapes
no utterance of anything solid
a fluttering thing
that holds your attention



holds it
as long as the glass is full
ice reflecting the hues of miscommunication
measured in proofs
in how much hope
you can hold between mutual distractions
when pleasure is so self-serving
it calls out its own name
hoards everything else
See these
these are the best ones
the lies that can only remember
who you are
once you’ve left
the only part
you did not ever think
you would lose again

Sunday, January 09, 2011

a note to would be wanna be superheroes

I get it. I mean we all have had those moments when we imagine ourselves hero and sometimes dare I say superhero. In fantasy world it’s great! We have super speed, we can pick shit up that’s ridiculously heavy and toss it like so much salad, but in reality world, we know this is not the case. I mean, we do know this? Don’t we?

Every year in my classroom I do a unit on superheroes. We discuss character traits, strengths, weakness and the difference between hero and superhero. We acknowledge the heroes in our lives our communities. Firefighters, police officers, the neighborhood crack head that doesn’t let anyone fuck with you. Citizens who protect and serve not looking for praise or celebrity. Who also go through training and know exactly how to carry out their jobs without endangering themselves or other, possibly with the exception of the crack head.

So like, you know how in pretend land, the hero, because in pretend land unless you have a super power like flying, melting shit with your eyes or sense tingling you were a hero or a vigilante. Vigilantes are those dudes or chicks that take shit into their own hands when no one asked them too. clearing throat

ANY WHO, in pretend land have you ever seen, oh I don’t know, Spiderman or Batman do an interview on, SAY, Good Morning America or the Today show? No, No you don’t! And do you know why? Because it’s a fucking secret! Yes they run around in garish costumes with shiny gadgets but that shit is on the low, because just like there are those guys that wanna do good there are those who have no problem running a train on good. So when you go on television and tell people how you used to do this at your last job but folks felt some kind of way, you are telling folks who you are. The point of a secret identity is…it’s supposed to stay secret??? Keep up!!

So in for real world American’s are slipping further and further from reality so I can see how you can mix up pretend and real world from time to time. But in the real world when you get shot no stunt real life dude guy takes the bullet for you. And if you don’t have super powers you are not a super hero. Movies aren’t real and neither is television, sometimes even the news. I know (rubbing your back), it is it’s a hard pill to swallow and I really hope you don’t end up dead because you went public like a dumb ass.

In teaching my Superhero Unit (hands on hips, profile looking fly) what happens is that when students have to take into account character, and that you don’t help people for fame or glory, that how knowing the right thing to do is hard many of them ask to create a villain. We talk about how easy it is to be the villain. No accountability is appealing to them; not having to consider the impact on others is a draw to the darker side. I don’t let them take the easy out in my classroom, but there are plenty of folks who take the easy out in this world. How else does a grown man stab a teenage boy to death in a crowded place over a cell phone?

I think it’s noble to wanna help folks but if you are helping not realizing the danger you are putting yourself in a reality check may be in order….just saying

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Poem a day for 30 days!!

I have to do better about blogging and I promise that I will do so. I haven’t given up on this blog, I have lost all of my followers however and I will work hard to get them back… so stay tuned or tune in for one Poem(or more) and one Haiku a day