The Third Time is Phucking Free.

I had a moment today that put one of my confusing to myself perspectives in clearer view. I give folk three chances in most things, even love and this is bad. Who needs their heart broken by the same person three times? Well, me apparently. Working on that mostly by staying away from anything or one that might get a hopeless romantic going, it's all I got for now, still healing.

Today I went shopping to make the bomb ass Enchilada Casserole, see picture below, and I used a coupon that is worded strangely and every time I use one of them the cashier has no fucking idea what she/he/they are doing. Every. Fucking. Time.

This time the cashier has given the coupon too much value.

I know what the phuck you're thinking, a deeper discount just take it and go, And I hear you, but Karma is a fuck place with GPS and sometimes I am too damn honest for my own good. Ask my ex's.

So I say to her, well it should actually be for $2.19 not 3 dollars. She looks at me like I slapped her dog and called her stupid.

I got a neck roll y'all.

She read the coupon back to me like I was stupid and she slapped my dog. She so fuckin lucky I don't have a dog. So I just said, no I wasn't judging the coupon, it's worded funny, just thought you should know.

I got a teeth suck y'all.

She read it again, pointing at the words, loudly. I gave her a Dora the Explorer stare, you know the one where you hear the blink. That was the third time so I accepted the discount. This way I can show Karma the receipt and be like, Heffa look.

This thing reminds me of the free dryer. Not hair a dryer but the big ass thing that dries wet clothes, that dryer. It was the same thing. I went to buy it ran my credit card a second before

remembering that I put the $300 limit cause the holidays and I was spending entirely too much money on relationships that I was the only one who thought that's what that was. Of course the card was declined. I told them why it declined. They looked at me like,"Yeah, sure that's why." Told them I'd be back in 20 minutes just leave it where it is. I came back 18 minutes later. Walked up to the service counter where my new shiny ass dryer sat looking at me like, "Yeah, I'm going home with you tonight!"

My turn. I tell the cashier that I am here to pay for my dryer and I point to it proudly. She pulls off the paperwork attached and says,

Her -"You taking it now or do you want it delivered?"

Me- "Delivered."

Her- "What's your address?" I tell her.

Her- "Thursday morning OK?"

Me - "Thursday morning is great!"

Her- "Ok, NEXT."

Me- "I need to pay you."

Her - "It's paid for, you wanna another copy of the receipt?"

Me- "No I haven't paid yet."

Her- (pointing at the receipt like I'm stupid) "What does that say?

Me- "Paid. But I's not cause..." She cuts me off.

Her - "Are you Theresa Davis?"

Me- "Yes, but."

Her- "Do you live at (she says my address loudly and I'm like oh yea, tell the stalkers everything why the phuck don't ya in my brain and starting to get irritated)

Me - "Yes, but"

Her - "Here's the copy of your receipt and it will be delivered on Thursday."

That was the third time.

Free dryer with no threat of Karma coming back at me and if this person's drawer came up several hundred dollars short, she brought that shyt on herself three times.

So it's a good policy with stuff, but I gotta not do it with my heart. Gotta try something new there.

There is only so much tape.

There are only so many poems.

That's a lie, There are tons of poems.

see.

Too fucking honest!

a note to would be wanna be superheroes

I get it. I mean we all have had those moments when we imagine ourselves hero and sometimes dare I say superhero. In fantasy world it’s great! We have super speed, we can pick shit up that’s ridiculously heavy and toss it like so much salad, but in reality world, we know this is not the case. I mean, we do know this? Don’t we?

Every year in my classroom I do a unit on superheroes. We discuss character traits, strengths, weakness and the difference between hero and superhero. We acknowledge the heroes in our lives our communities. Firefighters, police officers, the neighborhood crack head that doesn’t let anyone fuck with you. Citizens who protect and serve not looking for praise or celebrity. Who also go through training and know exactly how to carry out their jobs without endangering themselves or other, possibly with the exception of the crack head.

So like, you know how in pretend land, the hero, because in pretend land unless you have a super power like flying, melting shit with your eyes or sense tingling you were a hero or a vigilante. Vigilantes are those dudes or chicks that take shit into their own hands when no one asked them too. clearing throat

ANY WHO, in pretend land have you ever seen, oh I don’t know, Spiderman or Batman do an interview on, SAY, Good Morning America or the Today show? No, No you don’t! And do you know why? Because it’s a fucking secret! Yes they run around in garish costumes with shiny gadgets but that shit is on the low, because just like there are those guys that wanna do good there are those who have no problem running a train on good. So when you go on television and tell people how you used to do this at your last job but folks felt some kind of way, you are telling folks who you are. The point of a secret identity is…it’s supposed to stay secret??? Keep up!!

So in for real world American’s are slipping further and further from reality so I can see how you can mix up pretend and real world from time to time. But in the real world when you get shot no stunt real life dude guy takes the bullet for you. And if you don’t have super powers you are not a super hero. Movies aren’t real and neither is television, sometimes even the news. I know (rubbing your back), it is it’s a hard pill to swallow and I really hope you don’t end up dead because you went public like a dumb ass.

In teaching my Superhero Unit (hands on hips, profile looking fly) what happens is that when students have to take into account character, and that you don’t help people for fame or glory, that how knowing the right thing to do is hard many of them ask to create a villain. We talk about how easy it is to be the villain. No accountability is appealing to them; not having to consider the impact on others is a draw to the darker side. I don’t let them take the easy out in my classroom, but there are plenty of folks who take the easy out in this world. How else does a grown man stab a teenage boy to death in a crowded place over a cell phone?

I think it’s noble to wanna help folks but if you are helping not realizing the danger you are putting yourself in a reality check may be in order….just saying