I am going to work up a review of the year but that could take a minute so I’ll give you the play by of the past few weeks.
iwps was amazing!!! the blast I had was memorable. I was deemed the best wing-man ever by Cuban and did the poems I wanted to leave there. yeah!!!!
I opened for R.I.S.E. on Friday. awesomeness!! my good friend Meadow was finally able to road trip with me. we had a great time! we had dinner at her favorite vegetarian restaurant, the 9% beers a nice finisher. then we, the amazing navigators of the south, left the parking deck to drive to the venue only to park back in the same lot…I blame the beer, and the quirky Asheville streets that are closer to things than they appear. we opened for the band and Meadow was meadowfabulous as usual and now all of Asheville loves her…i'm sooo not surprised.
we’re in the band!!!!!
so, i've decided that once a month i will offer up new info about me. you know, things you may not know. hidden fears, lustful longings, meandering memories, some shyt you could care less about, that sort of thing.
so, this thing happens to be three of my fears.
my bathroom fears…..
oh yes,it's about to go down (no pun intended..or was it?)
#1. my hair touching toilet water or even the seat.
as my hair is too long, considering a trim, I have to do a certain amount of preparation before going. if loose this is usually accomplished by twisting it in a knot on top of my head, which has a tendency to shift especially when navigating the port o potty...eeewh! when braided much easier. if you ever see a dread headed woman shrieking at the top of her lungs ripping locks out by the handful this is what happened. please stop me. i don't think ripped bald is a good look for me.
I remember once maybe two years ago my hair touched toilet water, thank the goddess after flushing, but still I felt it necessary to strip down and hop into the awaiting shower. ok, I was at a party, and I didn’t know where the towels were, and people were waiting to go. still it had to be done.no i haven't been invited to another party there......go figure
#2. dropping my cell phone in a toilet.
I think I am not the only one who has this fear. this is why I purchased a pouch for the phone as this almost happened and in my lunge to catch it and #1 almost happened…would have been disastrous.
#3. dropping my wallet in the toilet.
yes, this is why I stopped carrying a wallet. once while standing after a mission completed my wallet slipped from my back pocket and narrowly missed falling in the toilet. Two weeks ago my mom yelled at me for not carrying a purse. i stared at her uncomprehending and we settled on a wallet. so I put my stuff in a wallet. was working out ok until….
so my hair is still in tact, my phone moisture free…..but I’ve learned what money laundering means on a gross level..
so I’d like to leave you with this gross but true fact,
because I am sure I am not the only one to have done this…
DO NOT PUT MONEY IN YOUR MOUTH AND WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER HANDLING..YOU REALLY, REALLY, REALLY DON’T KNOW WHERE IT MAY HAVE BEEN!!!!