Saturday, September 10, 2005

draggin' my ass

i will not be using capital letter and my punctuation may be sketchy my spelling will in some cases be wrong because the u and p keys on my comter, computer stick from time to time.
i can not get my shit together,
it's like i'm moving through jello all slow and slower.
i don't seem to have any energy and it occurs to me that a doctor's visit may be in order.
i drank an energy drink the other day and was knocked out to the point of drooling 30 minutes later,
that would be the opposite of energy.
still feeling helpless and unmotivated wanting to help all those displaced but not really knowing how.
i am doing some benefits but it hardly seems enough.i wish i were a mega church, not so much the god thing but the money thing,
hey have they stepped up yet?
the dollars and the longs?
can i vent a minute?
of course i can,
it's my blog and i can bitch if i want to.
bitch if i want to,
bitch if i want to,
you would bitch to if this happened to you!
that made me grin,
so i went to uhaul to rent a storage space and the peson who was helping me....
i guess we could call it that,
drug this 30 minute process out to an hour and a half.
i was transfixed by her lack of everything.
i watched her like one would watch maybe a car crash just morbid curiosity seeing how long this would take and how she managed to look efficient while not accomplishing much.
it was surreal, between the gold donning most of her front teeth,
the nails that threatened to skewer me,
and the fact that her phone rang no less than seven times while she was not helping me,
by helping me.
the ring tone some obnoxious rap tune calling me a hoe,
seven times,
which she answered everytime telling me after every call that if it wasn't important she wouldn't have taken the call. when what i could deduce from the one side of the conversation was the where and what club would be hopping seemed to be the topic.
i love a party scene as much as the next gal,
so she was right it was very important.
i would feel bad if my acquiring a storage unit from her at work
interfered with her party plans after work.
i tried not to look confused, and couldn't,
which she took as me not understanding as she slowed her speech and talked louder
i almost laughed (it would have been an insane laugh)
as i signed my possessions soul over to the uhaul underlord.
my entire week seems as strange as that moment.
i did hear some awesome poetry at cliterati
and collin rocks my world.
madeline will set java's ears on fire.
i've taken to being reserved in my reading so much so that i didn't even recognize my own words, i've got to not do that in the future.
i have not felt this sensitive in like forever.
that's what i need,
and not the battery operated kind.
sadly i'm not even motivated to meet people,
and how are you going to sleep with them if you don't meet them.
no one's interested any way.
i've turned into this boring old person.
it had to happen.
okay i'm watchin my daughter play the willie wonka ps2 game. and insane squirrels are attacking her character and it is fucking funny. she's screaming "rabid squirrel" and "get him off, get him off". a good cleansing laugh, that felt good.... there she goes again...haaahaaahaaa
check ot my lame ass web site and please offer up suggestions.
also if someone would like to write a bio for me that would be cool, when i talk abot myself i sound stid, stuid, stupid, shit...see what i mean.

1 comment:

Collin said...

The new site rocks!!!! Who did it for you?

Love that pic of you, Alice and Hassan in the theatre seats. Very dramatic.