Sunday, July 31, 2005

House of Poets

Great week!
My sister got married yesterday, despite me reminding her how evil that institution is.
It's like prison with sexual privileges.
She doesn't believe me, she believes she's found her soul mate.
She might be right lord knows they have been through enough.
I had to leave before the drink kicked in.
My daughter called me saying, " Mom, I think your sister's traumatizing me. She's......she's....Well, I think she's (whispering) drunk."
I said." Is she in the same room that you're in? "
"Yes."
"Can everybody else in the room see her?"
"Yes."
"Then why are you whispering?"
"Cause' if she hears my voice she going to start hugging me and telling me how beautiful I am."
"That traumatizes you?"
"Yes."
"Get over it dude you are beautiful. Don't let her hit her head if she passes out, that would not make for a nice Wedding night, and is likely to really traumatize you."

Dawn Axam-Hocker is incredible!! Last night was a sneak preview of a show she has coming up on August 19, 20, &21. Two of my poems are being performed by dancers!
Very exciting!!!!!
Warning Signs, will be performed by 5 dancers and performed in August.
Thief a new piece written for cancer survivors was rehearsed with a woman, last night she became ill and a new dancer and I were introduced.
His name is Jule, he's beautiful.
We had a whole ten minutes for me to run the poem twice and he get a feel on how he could improv it. He danced behind me, thank god for I have some attention issues, so I couldn't see him. But the response of the audience was great. My buddy Stacie videotaped it and it looks so good.
So needless to say those of you who know me it took till 3 or 4 am for me to calm down.

I am featuring at House of Poets August 1, 2005 @ 8pm!!!

House of Poets takes place at The Red Light Cafe on Amsterdam.
I just found out so I have not had time to advertise. Please, Please, Please if you can come out and support HOP (House of Poets) and me tomorrow!!!
Pretty please with sugar on top!
I'll be your Friend.
Your special friend!
Yes, I will consider putting out if you come to my show??????
There are however stipulations...

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Karaoke...The New Crack!

So if some of you don't know, Turner and Bear rock my world.
They had a reading and discussion last night at Charis about gender, gender roles, trans and other terms and shared some of their personal experiences.
I love them.......
Really I do!

After Turner was all like " So let's go to My Sister's Room?"

I was like,"It's Karaoke Night.?"

Bear was all like, " I Love Karaoke."

Melissa was like," I will come but I'm leaving at 11." She didn't leave til after 1. Not her fault it was the Karaoke Crack.

We go to Karaoke night.
Bear and Turner very excitedly hunting for songs to sing, me nursing my Corona.

Then there was lots of singing
it ranged from good to oh my god I'm so embarrassed for you.

Some how Melissa and I get caught up in Karaoke hell and submit songs to sing.
If I have not mentioned it, I can do a lot of things,
singing,
not so much.
So I turned in our songs.
I have never done this before.
Correction, I felt fairly sure that I would never do this in my fucking life.
I karaoke in the shower where only the people in the house at the time have to suffer.
Or in my car windows down so the gushing wing carries my bad tunes up, up, and away.

They call Melissa, who sings 9 to 5, she kicked ass.
Then I realized I could be next!
At the same time I realized that I was no where near enough drunk to do this.
Bear noting my dismay promptly bought me a shot of Tequila.
Still not drunk enough but the smell of tequila on my breath may convince some that I am.

I sing (if in all honesty we can call it that) Lenny Kravits "Fly Away".
I took off my head scarf so the Locks could distract from my actual singing if that is what we agree to call it. Apparently I was better than I thought, because while Turner took Photo's of Melissa (damn camera phones), they got caught up watching and there are no incriminating photos of me in a karaoke induced fit of what I believe we agreed to call singing.

We, Melissa and I actually contemplate singing, (again a questionable description of what we did) another song. But then I did it. There I was having successfully done this embarrassing thing and came out of it with no evidence that it had taken place.
Next thing I know,
and in my defense were just going to say the Tequila kicked in ,
I am on stage with Keisha (who really can sing),
Jocelynn and Turner singing Proud Mary.
When the song gets faster I jump off the stage doing my Tina Turner impersonation.
Lots of jerking motions and gyrations, I'm pretty good at that, next thing I know, the bartender is pulling me on the stage saying "those white girls need to get down, you need to be up there." Coming from a white girl I took this as a compliment. Now, low and behold, there is a video account of that slip, that downward spiral into the scary world of Karaoke. Damn camera phone with video capability!
I think if I stop now I can beat this thing.
It's just like crack.....you know ......Help!!!!!

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Hot as hell !!!

I think I am dehydrated.
Not to the point of falling out but enough to make my head foggy.
I often forget to drink water. I must fix that. I always have water in the car.
Right now I have about 5 bottles most half full. I have got to do so much better.

You know how you meet people and you tell them what's going on,
what you're doing,
and they tell you they're going to come and see you?
But basically, they are lying to you, as they are not interested and have no intention to...Whoa big time digression, sorry.
Well, I had a conversation with someone last Friday
in between being confronted by someone who thought
I was competition and accosted by someone else who tried to eat my face
(people should ask before they try to check if you still have tonsils).
In the midst of all that madness and there was more madness that I can't even get into, needless to say if I had actually wanted that much attention,
it most certainly would not have happened,
I had a conversation with someone about what I was doing.
She said she was going to come and come she did!
Not like that, boy I tell you some folks just keep their minds dirty on purpose.

The reading at Outwrite was great.
I was so nervous.
Headgames was a big hit believe it or not I am not the only one who has had to deal with that. Go figure. A lot of people came to support me.
SOVO was out interviewing people about gender roles.
I don't get why people are so focused and distracted by this.
I thought long ago when women braved to get the fuck out of the kitchen and men got in touch with their inner woman, we learned that your gender is just that, it doesn't predetermine you for any role in this jacked world.
People are people.
They live their lives and just because some people aren't afraid to be the person they want to be, those who are get to ask these kinds of questions so that they can judge.
I mean because you are male and church going, wearing your suit and tie, singing your soul out for Jesus, because you do these things does this make you a good man or father?
Or, is it possible for you to be a deadbeat dad, hypocrite, asshole?
And If you were a woman who did the same thing,
Guess What?
You Would Still Be An Asshole!
So it isn't gender we should be fearing or judging...
it's ASSHOLISM!

I am blogging in the nude again,
sitting directly under a fan,
watching Constantine (which is pretty good) and sweating like fiend.
I don't want to move from this spot as uncomfortable as it is.
I have so much shit that needs to,
the phone is ringing...goddammit that means I've got to move, hold on.

It was Sautee Nacooche,
say it three times fast, it will make you smile.
They want me to come back on October 15th!
Yeah!!! Of course I have to check dates but it sounds right.
Very cool.
I have to put on clothes now walk out to my car and get my planner so I can be doing something and feeling productive. When all I really want to do is go to an air conditioned movie theater and eat nachos.
Resist the urge to slack off.....
Resist the urge to slack off..........
Resist...
I wonder when Charlie and the Chocolate Factory starts..........mmmmmmm canned cheese;-)

Monday, July 25, 2005

Rock Star

So......It seems I shall have to reconsider my staunch opposition to exercise.
My baby keg,
I call her Honey,
is out of control and trying to come between me and my feel good pants.
Can't have that.
I prefer exercise of a more close, horizontal, sweating, touchy, feely, tasting kind of way.
Since that shits not happening anytime soon, I may have to go back to my regiments of the long ago days when I was cheering and doing the pageant's.
Dammit,
I was really trying not to go back their,
the flashbacks are awful,
the pyramids and constant clapping,
the smearing of Vaseline on teeth to make a smooth smile,
pivot, wave, turn.
I think I see therapy on my horizon.
That is unless we( me and Honey, that is) find an eager participant to reignite my preferred form of exercise.
I'm not giving up on my mission,
o look good in the feel good pants and find a real exercise partner,
but in the mean time Honey will not be happy with the sit-ups and lite beer,
and neither am I!

Java Monkey was so good last night.
The host, Kodac, always breaks the list down in to gender.
Last night two gender-jammers were there.
Fucked up the method to the madness of Java demographics.
All I could think was Collin would love this!
The gender benders only eluded to their true gender and I believe Kodac loved it!
I have never seen him smile so much!
Turner and Bear Rock my world!

I wrote a new piece called Interview for the Position of Rock Star Poet.
I know the title is long as hell I'll work on it.
I like the piece it makes me laugh.
But we Gemini's have this belief that we have an excellent sense of humor,
and we do,
it's just that occasionally we find that particularly humorous thing,
that oddly is only funny to us.
Go figure.
So I thought that this might be one of my Gemini moments.
I tried it out and wasn't completely happy with my delivery.
I got my buddy Melissa to direct me in the performing of it.
Felt kinda a little stupid in the big theater on the stage reciting a poem that has the word spam in it, it was kinda hard to stay focused,
but I did it.
Her help made all the difference, she has been deemed the Director of Poetry!
I really liked the piece and it was very well received.
Fun, Fun, Fun, you folks need to come to some of these events!!!!
You are truely missing all the goddamn fun!
All work and no play.....You know!

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Saute Nacooche

What a week! I traveled to Saute Nacooche.
Not as sexual as it sounds, but it was very fun.
I had several revelations the main one being I have no DAR whatsoever!
I can't tell gay from straight, young from old enough, luckily I can tell boy from girl, but lately that seems about it.

The performance was at a center in Saute Nacooche, I just like typing those words and saying them. They sounds so dirty!!! Say it three times fast. It will make you smile, I promise!

Picture this......... me in WHITE county,
performing in front of about 100 or so WHITE people,
when in the middle of my very political set I realized I am probably standing in BUSH hell!
But I knew my friend Lisa had my back. I made what I hope are a lot of new friends there.

All was well, although, the video dude was so enraged by my performance that he went off on the organizer and said a little something like this," What the fuck is she going on about! You call this Art, you call this Poetry! This is bullshit and she is full of shit!" It made my heart swell with pride! My Daddy would have been proud!!!
They put me up in this beautiful bed and breakfast which could have been so much nicer with a Friend.
Know what I mean?
They want me to come back in October, any takers?
Guess who is on the first page of Labrys?
I don't know who she is but she is fine!!!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

With Every Beat of My Heart!

28,000 pace makers recalled?
28,000 pacemakers recalled?
Models between 1997 and 2000!
How the fuck do you check your model number?
They are offering free replacements.
I beg to differ there is no way that could be free.
Okay they may Lego there way into giving you a pacemaker that will actually work,
they may even be able to hire a Mc Surgeon to put the goddamn thing in,
but this will not be free.
How many people wake up and say to themselves,
" It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining, but it's a little hot. I think I'll check myself into a well air conditioned hospital and while I'm there I think I'll get a pacemaker."
No body does that shit!
You can best believe the majority of those people were sick as shit
when they HAD to have it done!
Everytime you open your body up you risk something, the risk makes this shit absofuckinglutely
(since this is not a word it matters not that I spelled it wrong) not free
Free, this country fucks with my head daily,
reminder buy more mental condoms!

28,000, not 50, not 5,000, but 28,000!
I wonder if Bush would fire anyone who had anything to do with this,
has he fired the one who had to do with that other thing?????????????

I want to see the article titled,
28,000 MIND FUCKS RECALLED BUSH FIRED AS A RESULT,
that would make me happy!

Completely unrelated, Is anybody else extremely horny, or is it just me. Cause it could be just me, I was just askin'?

Monday, July 18, 2005

New Poem

I'm Not
c Theresa Davis 2005

Am I the salt in your tears?
The age in your years
The spark in your flame
The ache in your pain

The beginning of your end
The right you defend
The hope in your dream
I’m not at all what I seem

The voice in your ear
The root of your fear
The beat of your heart
The stop of your start

The in to your out
The scream in your shout
The blood in your veins
The dice in your game

The rhythm that moves your feet
The stare your eyes can’t meet
You don’t doubt me at all
Think I’ll catch you when you fall

I’m an enigma, a dream
Not at all what I seem
I’m the lie to what is true
Not the right girl for you

I’m not

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Blogging in the Buff

I am blogging in the nude.
It's very liberating I feel a sense of freedom that I don't feel when I blog with clothes on.
I feel like if I want type an x for no apparent reason I can just type an x. Watch x.
Now that's freedom.
I did poetry in Little 5 yesterday.
What an interesting thing. I am not a PG poet and I think folks realized that.
Some happily so, some surprisingly so, those who were surprised also left.
There were several people with picture phones taking my picture, makes me nervous. Especially the one who snapped me calling Bush an Asshole.
Oh well, If I go down for my poetry, I'll go down calling that egomaniac, self-absorbed, world dominator wanna be, fucked-up, liar, cheat who needs to go out on a man date ( get it mandate, man date, like a date with a man...get it). I'll go down for calling him the asshole that he is.

It looks like one of my boobs is slightly higher than the other?
I'll fix it by moving the lap top.
Okay, feeling weird now blogging in the nude,
going to put my clothes on now.
See you!

Alex thanks so much for helping out yesterday!!!

Thursday, July 14, 2005

My New Dream


I think I want to be a Fanta girl! I'm thinking mint green. I think I have a good chance the have no dreads represented. Yes, a Fanta girl, it's all so clear to me now. Everything I've done up to this point has been leading up to me as a Fanta chick! Yes, imangine the girl talk, the parties, yes, I am destined to be the Lemon Lime Fanta babe!

It is bovine appreciation day today. This means you must appreciate the cow! Have a burger, have a shake, go out and buy that fine ass leather coat you've been lusting after. Go out be obnoxious claim it's all because of the mad cows of the world!!!

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Hypothetically Speaking

So, say you know this person who has been pretty damn patient. She filed all the proper paper work to reclaim her freedom. Then say the other party in this, this, hypothetical situation, drug the paper work out as long as it possibly could. Then say the pretty damn patient one, finally got the attorney of that other person to get off his hypothetical ass and take care of business, and things looked as if they were almost settled. Then hypothetically, say the attorney started dragging her ass, pissing the patient one off in ways that could be dangerous. My hypothetically speaking, my question is this, if the other party was I don't know hit by a bus and the attorney was hit by a bus while standing in a puddle of water that was simultaneously struck by lightning, do you think my paper work would go through faster?
Hypothetically speaking that is.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

I forgot?

I forgot to post to tell you if I remembered what I forgot.
I didn't.
I have a lot to do and not really sure how to do it.
Such is life I suppose.
I can not wait to go to New Mexico!
I am so sure that a change of scenery will lighten my mood, I am just giddy with the thought.
Some of you are wondering what a giddy Theresa looks like.
I don't know but I'm sure it's scary!
I saw The Fantastic Four today. Very well done, they tried very hard to stick to the comic and strayed very slightly but all in all, a good job! Thought about sneaking into another movie but that's more fun when you are with someone, sneaking by yourself is unfulfilling cause there's nobody to say" remember when we snuck into like five movies that day!" to,
I mean you could in theory have that conversation with yourself, but if you have it aloud you may insure that you forever go to the movies by yourself! I don't want that for me so I declined sneaking into another movie! I am rebeading my hair. This is the act of replacing or reinserting beads that flew off in the last few months. I may have gone to far as my head is very heavy, very pretty, but very heavy. I never would have thought that I would be into my hair like this. It's not like I look for my reflection in every shiny surface I see, but I really get into decorating it and it makes me feel good when people who know the real me ( not the scary, intimidating, aloof made up me) say "that's new!" I love it when people are aware and observant, it's sexy!
I may however, need a neck brace to accent my artsy hair in the future!

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

ahhh

The more I clean my classroom the messier it gets.
My Feng shui whatever it's called and spelled is broken.
I have to make a dent in the mess or I will start school crazy,
no one wants that.
I am working hard to stop cursing and more work needs to be done.
I am also trying to quit smoking, now here we have a slight problem.
I am still fighting this funk and my mood is already kinda......whats the word.......
shitty! So quiting vices may be a bad thing.
Cutting back... yes!
Cold Turkey may end up with me on the news.
Think I finally figured out this tax bullshit.
I went to the Sumit Building today and handed them three years worth of taxes.
I am hopeful they the go in order but if they don't more forms will be in order.
It's all crap!
State is another issue, I have to mail it and I know people who filed a month before the deadline who still don't have their returns. Oh well, just do it!
I think I am supposed to do something tonight, but for the life of me I can not remember what it is. If you know what it is please call me and tell me so I won't be late. I gotta start writing stuff down! My mind is not as sharp as it once was, back in the olden days.
I will probably post again tonight when I remember what it was I forgot that I was supposed to do or after I did it?
My spell check isn't working so work it out!

Friday, July 01, 2005

I'm Not Really a Doctor..

I just play one on TV. So I am hormonally phucked up meaning I am all over the place.
Doc says I was supposed to be taking a multi vitamin this whole time...oooops.
I'm on it, should be regulated or regulating as we speeak, or as I type and you read.
I'm not good at routine things like taking a pill the same time every day. Plus it's boring, and predictable. But my Scary Spice impersonation minus the shoes, was starting to scare me.
I shall try to do it . Take the pills not be scary (unless you like that sort of thing).
The IRS refused my claim as an innocent spouse, I filled out the wrong form seems I'm an injured spouse which means I may be able to recoup some of my money taken to pay someone elses debt. Do not marry someone who is in bad with the IRS once they attach you ss# what's his becomes yours and they don't need a form to take you dollars, but you have to file a shit load of them to get it back. Going to read poetry at Barnes and Nobles w/ Collin and after going to go watch women boxing, just cause it seems like a good idea.